News from Nunnery Farm: Dave The Lamb Goes Absolutely Crackers

It is days like these when the farm becomes very frustrating. I am used to the hens taking their share of all the plants around the place and there is no way I would be without them and I can live with what they do but there is no excuse for Dave's madness - he is the Lamb Possessed. He has now joined the gang known as More Trouble Than They Are Worth Gang - Max and Matilda have been in it for ages but as from now there is a new member. I am so mad with that Lamb.

Did Dave Eat The Poppies

Each year I usually give up with my attempts at growing any veg having been beaten into submission by the hens who have either had all my bedding plants for lunch or executed a mass attack on the veg patch and successfully cleaned up. This year I am determined to grow something to go along side the meat and to have some nice plants in the garden. This year I am not giving up!!

Oh Dear

It was inevitable but I didn't expect it to start so soon after planting - but it did and Round 1 clearly went to the animals. Let the battle commence!

I planted almost a week ago now some cute little pots for each side of the gate, a really nice pot by the side of the door and treated myself to a little portable greenhouse well not exactly treated, it was only about £5 Bargain!!(exactly the same shape as an old punch and judy tent but without stripes and without puppets). I was really pleased with how the pots had brightened everything up. I thought the hens would have a go at them but they had been surprisingly good and stayed away. My little greenhouse was now home to my 3 tomato plants that had really gone mad with the recent warm weather and surprised me by producing a whole host of little yellow flowers which were being watched very closely by myself and my little boy. Also living in said Tent was a tray of recently sprouting seedlings all belonging to Kyle again that we were taking great care of. His lettuces and tomatoes had all burst from their seeds and were going from strength to strength, we were just awaiting the arrival of two pumpkin seeds who had yet to make an appearance and then it happened .....

My Flower Pot

It was then as I went out to do my usual security check making sure the hens and geese had not barged through my tightly secured veg patch that I noticed it. My Tent was on its side and had been dragged about 10 feet from where it lived. The plants were all lying on their sides out of their pots but with a bit of soil scooping and patting down they seemed to look ok. Not so much Kyle's tray this could only be described as a mess! I did my best and hoped he wouldn't notice. None of the suspected creatures were to be seen. Puzzled.

Then about an hour later I had to go past said Tent again and blow me if it wasn't on its side again with the tomato plants now not looking so good but still salvageable. The tray was in a dreadful state - it just lay on a mound of compost with seedlings all over the place none of which were in their little compartments. With a sigh and getting slowly fed up of the whole day I started scooping up and plonking back in wherever I could. I thought it best to move the tent around the corner out of the way for the evening. Once again puzzled.

On my way back through the little gate staring me in the face was one of my potted tubs just mindelessly vandalised - tipped up and plants pulled out and compost all over the place. Baffled, again no-one in sight - by no-one I was referring to either DAVE THE LAMB - OR MAX AND MATILDA THE DAMN GEESE) I once again started to scoop quickly - mainly due to me now being practically a soil scooping expert and being really mad - I was so mad. I went inside before I did something to Dave I might regret.

This morning I let the hens out and just had a quick look over towards the Tent - I could not believe it - no tent standing up - it was on its bloody side again - the 3 usual suspects were inching ever closer to a date with the pot! I unzipped the Tent and found myself staring at one big mix of soil, seeds and plants all out of their pots and bent over. Poor Kyle's seed tray was beyond salvation. Not at all happy I scooped everything back into the pots, just threw a bit of mush into a few seed pod in the tray and with that I gathered my withered poor excuse for greens and was gone.

Having completed Operation Rescue Tomato I put them all on the windowsill and Kyle's mush tray on another one. At least my flowery pots still existed.

Erm not now they don't. It appears there was an incident overnight - the flowery pots are no longer on the floor but have been moved on top of the wall as I have done a re-scoop for the last time.